Letting go
by chaffy123
Summary: Arthur has feelings for Merlin, he hides it as well as Merlin hides his magic. What will Arthur do? This takes place in the beginning of the series. Where Arthur goes and helps out Merlin when there is trouble in Merlin's mother's village. Arthur X Merlin or Merlin X Arthur (not sure yet) slight William X Merlin and Merlin X William.
1. Chapter 1

Chapter One

Merlin's POV

"Mother?"

"Oh Merlin."

It has been so long since I have seen you. Her hugs were just as warm and embracing.

"What are you doing here?", she has grown older, more grey hair and wrinkles. But there was something else, her eyes were full of sorrow. And there was a purplish bruise healing on her right cheek. "What happened to you?"

"Our village has been attacked. I need your help."

I nodded and lead my mother to Gaius, he could probably help with the bruising on her face.

This was not the first time my village has been attacked, and it definitely will not be the last. The knights of Camelot should be able to help. Arthur should be able to help. I walked into Arthur's chamber.

"Sir."

"Yes, what is it?"

"It's my mother. Her village is being threatened and I need to request a meeting with the King." I said sternly, looking right into Arthur's emerald eyes.

"Alright, that can be arranged. Is she in the city?"

"Ya, she is under the care of Gaius at the moment."

"Oh, is your mother in trouble?" His brows arched.

I smiled, he was a gentle creature if you know him well enough, "Yes, just some bruising around the eye. Gaius and her are old friends, apparently."

"Fine, I shall ask the King about a meeting."

"Thank you."

I slightly bowed and left the room, hurrying to check on my mother.

* * *

At King Uther's Court

"Sorry, but the land is beyond my domain, if I march soldiers there, it would be declaring war upon their land." King Uther finished the unsuccessful negotiation with my mother. She was on the ground, and Lady Margona helped her to her feet.

I have to go back and help everyone at the village. I cannot just let people and children starve to death.

As we all exited the court, Arthur and I headed up to the roof top of the castle.

"I am sorry about your mother, if it was my decision, we would be marching there right now."

"No, thank you for getting me an audience for the King." I smiled. Remembering just how much of a jerk Arthur appeared to be in the very beginning. So, he does have a heart after all. "However, I do have to leave your service."

"I understand."

"Thank you for everything."

There was a pause, he looked me in the eye and questioned, "You are coming back right?"

"Well, she is my mother and my top priority." Arthur seemed earnest and finally turned his longing gaze away.

"You are the worst servant I have ever had. No, truly. The. Worst."

"Thank you." I laughed. Hard to believe I might actually kind of miss him.

* * *

Arthur's POV

I cannot believe Merlin is just going to leave me and go back into his village. How much do I really mean to him? I can't just tell him to stay with me and leave his mother? Why am I even thinking about this? This is not the time for...

"My apologizes Prince Arthur." It was Gwen. Did I accidently walk into her? I was the one that was not walking straight. Why does she need to apologize.

"It is alright Gwen." I patted her on the shoulder and noticed that she was carrying Morgona's armor. "Where are you going with that?"

A flash of fear was shone through her eyes, but I reassured her my smiling. She sighed."Sir, you cannot tell King Uther about this. Lady Morgona and I are going to help out Merlin and go to his village."

"That is a great idea."

"I am sorry sir."

"Sorry, never mind." I did not realize I was speaking out loud. "Go on then. Better hurry."

She nodded and hurried off.

I cannot leave with them, father would not allow it and it would be too obvious. Walking back into my chamber, I got some people to prepare my hunting gear. I am going to go on a hunting trip for a while. And I shall leave tonight. I wrote that down on a note and sent it to a messenger. By the time my father realizes that there is something wrong, I would be long gone.

* * *

It was dark and I have been walking for quite some while in the forest behind Merlin's party.

Suddenly, there was rustling among the bushes. Quickly, I ducked and watched as a boy with a sword walk out from the bushes. He turned his back to me, and I recognized that it was Merlin. I placed by blade on his back, "I would ask you for money, but you won't have any."

Merlin swung and I ducked.

"Arthur, what are you doing here." His face was shocked and it pained me slightly. Was he that shocked that I came with him?

I just smiled. I have no idea what I am doing here. I guess if I really wanted to help, I could have brought some men with me. But seeing Merlin made me feel better.

"I came to help of course, and put that sword away. You look ridiculous with it."

He smiled in the dark, his dark blue eyes glistened with glee.

I smiled back and followed him back to where everyone else was sleeping.

Morning came so soon, and we were riding down to his village. I could hear the screams and shouts of livestock before I even saw the village. I rode faster, leaving everyone else behind.

A scar faced man was about to hurl an ax down on a defenseless farmer, I threw my sword towards him and stopped his action.

There were about 10 men with the leader - presumably the scar faced man. And they were fighters, but not a match for me. And after bashing swords for awhile, the leader decided that retreat was the best way to go. This men were falling like flies. "I shall take all your lives!" He shouted before he left the village. I knew his type. He would not eat his words and come back, to raid the harmless and meek farmers.

I looked around for Merlin and I saw him talking to another boy, a brunette in farmers clothes. They were chatting away and laughing, as if they were good friends. Mildly annoyed, I called out to Merlin.

"Merlin, gather the villagers."

"Wait a moment Arthur."

"Now Merlin."

Slowly but steady, Merlin walked away from the Brunette. The farmer boy was looking at me with eyes I recognize, and it was not a look I was fond of. It was a look of utter hate, a look of a mother when their son has been discovered with messing with sorcery. I could not bare to hold eye contact.

* * *

After giving a speech to the villagers to lift their spirits, I needed a well deserved rest.

I looked over to where I was supposed to sleep. It was a small and poor cot with little space. I lied down and shouted to Merlin, "Close the lights!"

"Alright, your highness. " The mockery was clear in this voice. I smirked, but after Merlin blew the lights out, he started to walk towards me. Did he have something he wanted to say to me? Before I was able to voice my discontent, he

"It must have been hard."

"Yea, it is like sleeping on a rock."

"No, dumbass, I meant living here."

"Well, life was simpler, as long as we had a roof over our heads and food, we were happy. You would have hated it here. And I did not know any better."

"I don't know. Why did you leave?" Merlin always had an air of mystery around him. He was the first person other than my father to go against me publicly and openly. The foolishly brave boy. That really is an attractive attribute.

"Oh, I don't know."

I kicked him in the face gently, "Oh, come on, tell me."

"It felt like ... It felt like... I no longer fit it with everyone else. And it was time for me to move on."

There was a pause, I looked at him through the light of the moon, "Do you think you fit in now?"

He smiled sadly, "I don't know yet." Then he closed his eyes and turned around.

I couldn't sleep after that. What does he mean he doesn't know? I treat him well. Okay, fairly well. I mean, I am here right now. No, he needs to tell me he feels safe and is happy. Slowly, I got up and stared at his face. His eyebrows were furrowed - how could he have fallen asleep so quickly? I touched his forehead lightly and rubbed my thumb over this eyebrows, trying to smooth the lines. From the gentle touches, he smiled slightly and I couldn't stop the urge to kiss him. Carefully, I pressed my lips against his, they were soft. He whimpered cutely and his eyebrows were back to where they were. That pulled me out of my own joyous bubble. I felt heat rushing from my face down to my groin because his mouth opened and his tongue licked my lips. I stroked his face savouring feeling and I got up and left the tent. I needed to take care of my growing need. I went into the stables and found that it was empty. Relieve, I took my horse and started to ride out into the woods.


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter Two

Arthur rode into the darkness of the woods and he did not notice the brown haired boy following his trail. William did not sleep that night, he did not trust Arthur and it displeased him when he found that that Arthur and Merlin were going to be sharing a bed. He never understood why Merlin left, he did not think differently of his friend. Despite all that, right now, he is just curious to why Arthur was going out at this time of night in this night clothes.

William was a sensitive fellow and extremely quiet. He tracked Arthur until Arthur stopped in front of a lake. The moon light was shining down upon Arthur as he took off his night clothes, revealing this toned chest and arms. William felt that his cheeks flushed and he wanted to look away, but the overwhelming urge to know what Arthur was going to do was too great. With a deep breath, he maintained his eye contact.

Arthur had his eyes closed and he seemed to be deep in thought, slowly, he took off his pants too. It revealed his raging hard on. William almost gasped audibly and his face flared up. _That is what Arthur of all people choosing to do at this time of night? He was sleeping right beside Merlin too! _Instead of what William thought Arthur was going to do, he walked towards the lake and sunk his body into the cold water._  
_

Arthur sunk his head beneath the water and held his breath. He often did this to calm down. The coolness of the water did help his heat, however, he could not get the image of Merlin out of his head. No matter how much he tried. _Maybe I should just... _Slowly, he emerged out of the water. After all, he was alone and it has been so long since we was even close to doing anything of the sort. He walked to shore, his cock still up from thinking about Merlin and he decided to place his hand on his cock head and squeeze it. The pressure was needed and he started to stroke up and down.

William couldn't believe what he was seeing, and he wasn't sure about what to he keep staring at the sight of Arthur? Or look away? He wanted to keep an eye on Arthur, just in case something were to William would figure out what to do, Arthur decided to moan out, "Oh Merlin." and it froze William. So this is what this is all about. Oh god. He was rivaling a prince? A prince that Merlin served? His feelings for Merlin were buried deep. He did not want to burden his friend with it, Merlin already stressed out enough with his secret magical powers. His heart broke when Merlin left their little village. But this? Now William was afraid that Arthur was going to steal Merlin away. _But Merlin does not even belong to you. _A voice whispered in his head. That is not important, he decided. By the way things are progressing, Arthur has obviously not told Merlin yet.

When William focused back on Arthur again, he was just about to climax, the sight heating up William's cheeks. Arthur spread his legs out and formed a ring with his slender fingers and he was bucking into his fingers while his other hand played with his balls with abandon. The white liquid exploded accompanied by a strangled sound coming out from Arthur's throat. After taking a few deep breathes, he dipped himself back into the river while William headed back into the village. Arthur was under the water again, his tears were one with the water and he promised himself that no one would be able to see it.

His heart was filled with sorrow, he was a future King and he is supposed to be the perfect knight in shiny armor, accompanied by a fair skinned princess shimmering with beauty. His father would already be furious because he has feelings for a servant, let alone a man. And he did decided to hide these feelings forever and never let Merlin see them. This would be the first and last time Arthur thought about Merlin in this way.

Or so Arthur tried to promise himself.


End file.
